Monday, October 22, 2007 - conflicts, theories, and more :

been sometime since i blog, ok not really sometime since i blog in a few day basis. firstly would say. NO ONE READS MY BLOG! ok maybe some did but didnt leave any message or what so i find it quite dead anyway.

ok nth much do discuss about this. some updates would be i got sick but recovered cause i over exert my body during exercise -_-, and also saw M45 M1. nice.

ok things i would like to say is, hmm, maybe i aint being myself, yea i am trying to stay happy, but am i really happy, i joke ard, i making wrong joke at wrong timing, etc, worry over msn would result in causing more conflicts.

ok lets start it out. basically i know a friend of mine, quarreling over some issues regarding training over another guy. firstly i didnt knew he was that fierce, thought he was a friendly person, and likes to joke about, oh well, show me his other side of his character. good thing i guess, least he can be serious and friendly at the same time. well can say that i am temporary shocked.

ok some people i wanna like help but i aint perfect i cant help. ok nvm list first later then say

firstly, i got this friend of mine, she's having problems, which i dont know the real truth, but its basically from her friends and relationship, and more i guess. sometime seeing like she being lonely, ok, not as chatty etc, feels weird. dont know what shld i do to help.

2ndly, another friend of mine, having problems with family, if those who read my blog they will know who are they. more than that, would be time management, and also about her future. and more. things i could help would be talking to her and consoling her, consulting her, but first she has to pour open, let me know the troubles etc. i dont know. what shld i do again?

3rdly would be the girl i liked, yea, more problems with her exams and maybe also with the guy she likes, and if i kept on helping her i be like stabbing myself more and more and more. i also dont know what to do

4th? maybe one of my friends, he got certain troubles, aint telling anyone, just keeping it to himself.

5th?

6th?

dont know what trouble will arise next.

it seems that i like to help others somehow, cause i want people to be happy, but yet myself i am suffering inside, as karseng said, sad inside but try to smile. he is right actually. suffering how long? 2 years? 3 years? i dont know the period. i forgot already when. i just know i want my friends around me to be cheerful but i myself cant even help myself.

sometime it seems that i need more help than others. but i also want to help others.

too bad not much people know my darkside. got one, but wont tell. its too evil to hear.

am i being myself, or am i pretending to be someone perfect?

gtsfrost blogged at Monday, October 22, 2007